How to destroy a programming language (or natural language?) that you don’t like in one easy step with three difficult sub-steps
Sometimes, you don’t like a programming language (like Perl or Python), or a natural language (like English or Spanish).
You might have your reasons, or maybe not—maybe you just want to destroy it completely for no reason at all!
Proposal: Here’s a simple way to go about wreaking destruction on the language in question while leaving no one the wiser:
- Propose a “new and improved” version of the language. Example: “Perl 6 will be so much better than Perl 5!” Or: “Esperanto: it’s like English, but the spelling is much more regular!”
- Make sure it’s very similar at first glance, but annoyingly incompatible in key regards.
- Next, make sure there are a few bonus features, but not enough to actually justify the switching cost.
- For programming languages, start creating software in this language. For natural languages, start creating novels, newspapers, and works of art in this language.
- Make sure there is a HUGE delay in switching; “everyone should learn English 2.0, but it isn’t ready quite yet… so in the meantime, English 1.0 is deprecated.”
- Finally, you just have to wait! Instead of switching to the “upgraded” language, people will probably switch to an entirely different one.
Great examples in history:
- Successful destruction: Perl 5 –> Perl 6
- To be determined: Python 2 –> Python 3
- Failure: English –> Esperanto
PROS: Lets you surreptitiously destroy the language that has drawn your wrath.